So I've decided (and have) moved my blog, a sort of a re-launch maybe, it's still a little work in progress whilst I decide how to make my blog be all new and stuff, but it most definitely has moved. Visit why not, and remain a visitor by taking in it's majestic beauty at a different URL?
http://gingerevilc.wordpress.com/
See you there, and thanks for all the blogging blogger!
1. Do you know where your dad is right now?
I'm gonna do one of those MeMe's wot I saw on the social networking phenomenon BeFaceSpaceBo, enjoy.
2. Last time you kissed someone?
Downstairs.
3. What is something you've learned about yourself recently?
Not entirely sure, alcohol was involved.
4. What color is your watch?
I can't tell the time.
5. Do you like anyone?
I can't tell the time.
6. Are you close to your mum?
I like my Mum.
7. Where do you work?
I like my Mum.
8. What are you listening to right now?
N/A
9. What do you smell like?
My sweet lord.
10. What color are your pants?
Like manure.
11. Closest thing to your left?
A lacey red.
12. What color is your bedroom carpet?
Something foul.
13. Do you have a chair in your room?
No, I don't believe in them.
14. What time were you born?
I wouldn't be able to do this without it.
15. Do you play any sports?
In the morning.
16. What's your favorite number?
No, they don't agree with me.
17. Do you know someone named Lori?
One thousand, one hundred and thirty eight.
18. What color is your mom's hair?
Isn't that the name of a shampoo?
19. Do you have a dog?
It's brown.
20. Do you remember singing any songs as a kid?
No, I wasn't allowed.
21. When's the last time you went swimming?
In the summertime.
22. When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings?
Many years ago.
23. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?
About an hour ago.
24. Do you play an instrument?
Once I got one stuck up arse, I wasn't allowed. Shame.
25. Do you like fire?
Only when I'm trying to impress people.
27. When was the last time you cried?
No, it hurts.
28. I love you.
I'm too macho to answer that.
29. Have you ever been to a spa?
Can I get back to you on that?
30. Did you take science all four years of high school?
No, I can't afford it.
31. Do you like butterflies?
I gave it up as soon as I could (at 16).
32. Who made you laugh last?
I don't dislike them.
33. What is one thing you miss about your past?
When I killed someone.
34. Have you ever seen the school counselor?
Being a child
35. Have you ever wanted to be a teacher?
I had one?
36. What is one thing you have learned about life?
I don't want to be a teacher.
37. Are you jealous of anyone?
Not to be jealous of anyone.
38. Is anyone jealous of you?
Why ask that?
39. Ever been stuck in an elevator?
Everyone should be.
40. What does your dad call you?
Once it happened.
41. What does your mum call you?
By my name.
42. What does you hair look like right now?
Shaggy.
43. Has a friend ever used you?
A bit weird.
44. Has anyone recently told you that they like you more than a friend?
Now I think about it, someone probably has.
45. What have you eaten today?
Why would that happen?
46. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
Sausages.
47. What is your favourite movie?
My sister.
48. Who was the last person who texted you?
The parole officer.
49. What are you looking forward to?
Orange.
50. How was today?
Hell.
Well that was fun.
Not much has happened today for me to be able to answer that question.
I may have stolen a gag from a two Ronnies sketch, but ten questions into this MeMe I was bored and I had to do something different.Hopefully what I've written makes some sense.
Hilarious comedy sidekick: I like science, I want you to learn some science and report back to me.
Me: I have a GCSE in Science studies, dual award which is double the fun, what do want to know?
Hilarious comedy sidekick: How does science work
Me: Well you see... the thing is... what's interesting about science is... I could go on...
Hilarious comedy sidekick: Well evidently not as you're just staling for time
Me: Less of your lip you, well at least I have lips.
Hilarious comedy sidekick: Go learn science and I'll go get botox
Me: Can't we switch?
There was no reply, the puppet just stormed out. With the unfortunate argument with my comedy side kick running from my mind, I thought whilst that shite puppet would get botox, I would go get a learning of science. To the museum d'science I would go, to learn science, they have interactive displays, that would be fun, wouldn't it? I wasn't sure, I would ask the shite puppet, but he's busy getting shit pushed into his lips.
Well I went on the interactive science museum displays, and it turns out everything I learned from GCSE Science studies (dual award) was all wrong!
Crisps don't generate light, you can't eat airplanes, was my GCSE (dual award) not worth the paper it was printed on? I was emotionally distraught and went about engrossing as much science as I could, light bulbs generate light, your can eat food, not vehicles, revelations! It was wonderful time. I was all geared up to tell my hilarious comedy sidekick all about the science I'd learned, but sadly the puppet was so self obsessed all he want to talk about was his fabulous lips (to be fair, they did look good). What a wasted day.
my graduation! Whoop! (Well it was a week or two ago, cut me some slack). To be honest I wasn't really looking forward to graduation as a) it signaled the end of university for good and b) dressing smart and standing around awkwardly? Gah! But I guess it all turned out okay in the end and was a nice enough day. Well I got to see lovely people again and have my last student drunken evening afterwards.
Look its me getting graduated! Exciting and shaky! Although I'm getting a head of myself here. So yes that silly cloak and hat, what an odd set of clothes, thirty seven quid for the excitement of wearing it (for a few hours, I could have paid more and hired it for a week, imagine someone going into a club tarted all up with it on). There's four arm holes in the cloak, which was very exciting and confusing (no put your arms down the hole I was told, but I had down the hole, it was confusing, a minefield and frustrating to see me peers putting their arms in fine, well they got a higher degree classification, so it all makes sense, bigger brains). 
Look there's me all smartly dressed with my piece of paper that cost £3,600, bargain! (Thanks Tony Blair).
Well before the exciting ceremony when we were told what we'd have to do the Star Wars mentions came thick and fast. I was told it was like a Jedi cloak, that we could just pull out lightsabres, my Star Wars geek brain was exploding with creativity! AM I JEDI? Then I was told the actual ceremony was like the end of Star Wars Episode 4: A New Hope when Han and Luke (but not chewie) collect their medals from Leia. Would R2-D2 make it to my graduation, would chewie get his degree?
I got asked how does the music go in that scene, and I did a rousing version (ba-de-da, de da da...) while queuing up, it was stuck in my head! (Although I was subsequently given a tune which I was told would eradicate any tune that's stuck in your head, the theme tune to Animal hospital, it ruddy works!)
Although once I got in the whole thing felt like wedding, walk down the aisle with the person who comes closest to me alphabetically, how romantic. Wouldn't marry them. So I shook hands with the Chancellor, (of the university, not of the exchequer, sadly I'd love to shake that darling hand) a man that's the chairman of Reading football club (did I know this before hand, did I fuck). His name is John Madjeski and is like a hero of Reading, apparently. Although I wanted to shake hands with the vice chancellor instead as he looks like Kilroy (he could be the real Kilroy for all we know, what's Kilroy done recently, gone into hiding and become Vice-Chancellor of the University of Reading? probably). Look for yourself here, it's ruddy Robert Kilroy Silk.
And that was my graduation, over before it began, I'm sure there's more I could say (we threw our hats in the air, how cliche) but as I'm blogging this nearly two weeks later my memory is little fuzzy. I've only just remembered I have a blog. Toodles!
Inspired by Adam and Joe's recent feature here is a book I created at the age of eleven, a book that maybe you'll enjoy, or not, it's short so won't take up too much of your time. I present to you HappyHead - The Happy Menace. I could try and set this up and explain the character of HappyHead, but I'm pretty sure he's just a floating head. On with the story, a fantastic spoof of Star Wars: Episode 1: The Phantom Menace!
The Bonkers Mail like it, so maybe you will, it's a credible source (could I be making satire about the real Daily Mail? Probably not, but I'd like to think so). I'm not enjoying my use of the evil typeface comic sans on this, poor show son.
Ever had a book dedicated to you? No? Well you have now! I probably should explain I produced other HappyHead books, but I probably binned them, shame.
Recognise the 'plot'. I'm disappointed I made no mentions to taxation, trading and negotiations which also featured in the well loved Star Wars film.
I think the floating head is probably capable of jumping.
For someone called 'HappyHead' he isn't half a miserable shit, smile!
Oh he's smiling now he sees some Battle Droids.
Silly HappyHead. Ouch this is a bit dark, could I not think of a better way to end it? Well it is a spoof! (apparently)
So I felt bad about killing off the little fun bundle, so I enclosed a card for the reader. I also decided to graffiti my charming book a few years later, what a nob I was at seventeen, fortunately at twenty I now appreciate good literature.
And what of the other books? I only really remember the sick teacher book where HappyHead helped his sick teacher, a real heart warming tale. Maybe I'll find it, or maybe it's in a land site.
But what does the card say inside?
I hope you enjoyed this tale. Incidentally, if you want some surprisingly decent star wars juvenillia, you could do a lot worse than this.
...Donna Nobel was out time and all she had was four minutes to save the world.
What a marvelous homage to Madonna (Ft Justin Timberlake) (produced by Timbaland)'s hit song 4 minutes. You know, the song that goes 'I'm outta time and all I got is 4 minutes', you know, the one that says 'We only got 4 minutes to save the world'. Russel T sure loves Timbaland! Although I imagine I'm probably the only one who thought about this when watching the cracking episode.
I look forward to more winks to timaland in the next two episode (as well as winks to probably everything in the past four season as well as winks to the spin offs) such as Rose being 'too late to apolgise', the Jack telling doctor that he can love his just 'the way I are' and later telling him to 'give it to me' and of course some of the characters will 'Scream, at the top of your lungs, If your [their] body's feeling right'. How are these Timbaland Doctor Who gags working for you? Pretty terribly I imagine.
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Now playing: Madonna - 4 Minutes
via FoxyTunes
Well I'd spent the afternoon consoling myself (partly celebrating) after getting my degree classification (I got a 2:2, go umm... me! Meh) and I needed a drink to bridge the gap between my afternoon drinking and my evening drinking so popped into my local premiere store (other corner shops are available, but this one is nearer to my house). I decided instead of shop lifting (which I usually do), I'd pay for my pear cider (what can I say, I was drunk, that's a comment about me not shop lifting, and not my alcohol choice). Whilst paying the lady, to which I was making my purchase exchange with, she asked me about big brother (had I been watching? what's my thoughts?). Fortunately in my neurosis nervous panic constipation regime morning (what I mean by this phrase, only I have a vague idea, basically I was nervous) I foolishly read a little of this new series online to blag it. There's a couple/ was a couple in it, woah. I blagged it, summat about every year I tell myself I'm not interested in it, but somehow manage to know something of what's going on. I can't really remember the conversation is, the point is, I should be offended that I apparently look like a big brother watcher.
If I'd brought a copy of heat, by all means label me as a big brother watcher but I hadn't, better magazine are available. Is it now accepted that one must watch big brother? As a student (just about now) am I expected (as I have loads of free time) to watch this show? There's better to watch! Ask me about heroes (I'm still too early to add my thoughts on the season two finale, I think it was thingy that did it), ask me of Doctor Who (Yeah I quite like Donna, and I look forward to seeing Dave Ross in it), ask me on Lost (Jeremy Bentham is him?), ask me about Battlestar Galactica (I like that my friend that hasn't watched this season, but wanted spoilers, doesn't believe what I say happens). Geek Teevee is better, maybe I don't look geekey enough, just 'indie' maybe? Do 'indie' people watch big brother?
What's my point? Oh yes, I'm only blogging about big brother to conform with the masses. I want the camp one to win, he's hilarious.
(I did watch almost two episode because I have too much free time, don't remember much to say on them).
Now I like Doctor Who as much as the next geek who lives on the internet, I dare say I've got a few Doctor Who toys, I dare say I want more (the weeping angel one and the Simon Pegg one, and I'd like them to do a Sally Sparrow figure (and I would like to do Sally Sparrow, but thats not for here)) but this is just taking the piss (I dare say).
It's not a toy! What's poseable about that? What fun can one have? Now I dare say it's a few years since I'd have little adventures with my toys (Han Solo and Chewie sure used to have fun out in the garden) but what fun can someone have with a frame?
'Destroyed Casandra': Shit I'm destroyed! I need help, ah DOK-TOR, I see you there, help me!
Doctor: Cassandra! How can you see? How can you talk?
'Destroyed Casandra': Umm... moisturise me?
Sally Sparrow: Oh no Doctor, I'm naked
Doctor: Oh Sally, not infront of the frame
'Destroyed Casandra': I don't mind, I'm naked too
You can too! Don't say I don't give you anything.
Well I done these for this thread, but thought as the mentor wanted a blog, I'd kill two birds with one stone. Fancy a photo tour around my bedroom? Of course you don't, but for those who do, why not have a nosy around and make remarks about some of the contents, oh go on.
Forgive some of the slightly clunkly shitty captions, I tried to do some witty ones!
Well I'm reaching the end of my three year course studying Typography and Graphic Communication and I'm a little sad (it ain't quite over yet though... one exam to blag, and little bits to do here and there), but the main crunch of it is done. That crunch being my practical work. That crunch involved producing a display of all my third year work, what a crazy few days it has been, It's taken me a few days to catch up on all my sleep now (I think). Producing this crunch (still continuing describing it as a crunch? really? really?) involved hours of work, one whole night of no sleep, practically living in the department and over working myself to a panicked frenzy. What am I complaining? I think I oddly enjoyed it in a way (well up until 7 AM on the all nighter when shakes set in!). Anyway as you're reading my blog you're a little nosy, here's my display. Yes the prominent feature is a traffic cone, what a treat for all visitors of my display, including you, an e-visitor.
Not to shabby... I think. I certainly look hot at 5 in the morning.
P.S. international star wars day tomorrow... you know what to do.
What's the last thing you put in your mouth?
My penis what I put in my mouth.
Whoops, I forgot to put in a space, My pen is what I put in my mouth
What does your last text message say?
I have no idea, I'm not popular enough to get text messages, besides my phone is like on the other side of the room, and it might be private, who are you to ask for me to transcribe that text for your nosy pleasure? You people make me sick.
What was the last song you listened to?
I have Last FM to answer those questions, apparently it was steal my sunshine by LEN, what a tune.
What's your favorite colors?
I like all colours as long as they are used right.
Who do you trust in your life?
Everyone and no-one.
What name would you change your name to?
Marcus Aurelius, that sounds cool.
How often do you curse?
Alot. Want me to curse now as proof, well tough shit, I aint gonna pander to preconceived expectations.
Do you trust all of your friends?
Why should I not? if they like me, then they're trustworthy.
Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
I'd like to think so.
Name the things you would NOT tolerate in a relationship?
Being forced to walk around town naked. That relationship would be rather odd in my book.
Which one of your top friends do you think would make the best prostitute?
Top friends? Sounds a bit too MySpace, and seeing as I deleted that turd of a thing, I can't answer your question. Good escape there hey?
What features do you find most attractive in the opposite sex ?
Oh the usual.
What is a goal you would like to accomplish in the near future?
Finish my degree?
If you were to wake up from being in a coma for an extended time who would you want to see first?
Father Christmas
Would you make a good parent?
I'd be a wonderful parent, I'd take my sprog to the park all the time and take the sprogs to trips to the dentist and the candlestick maker. They'd be spoiled rotten my sprogs, that's for sure.
Where was your default picture taken?
On the facebook? Twas at my sister 18th birthday lunch meal out family lunch meal out.
What does your 11th text say?
We've been through this, I can't be arsed to go into this. Let's make up one though;
'Yeah she did lick it, but I was confused as to why'.
Its 4 in the morning, your phone rings who do you expect it to be?
Father Christmas
How is life going for you right now?
Dull.
Who was the last person you talked to on MSN?
Someone wise. I can't remember, but someone wise.
Last words you spoke?
"Oh it 6:55 AM, I aint getting out of bed now, I'm going back to sleep" Lazy turd.
Can you play guitar hero?
Never tried it. Should I?
Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
Inbetween, not too hot, not too cold.
What do you currently hear right now?
A plane going over head.
What do you think your best friend's doing right now?
Killing a man.
Who is your number one person on your friends list?
It's all alphabetically so some one A.
Do you feel like dancing?
Not at the moment, I'm still in bed.
How much money do you have on you?
Nothing, I don't carry money with me when wearing pyjamas, oh you are silly.
Is there someone on your mind that shouldn't be?
Yes. How dare they.
Do you speak another language other than English?
I have a GCSE in German and Italian. So no.
What did you do today?
Woke up, grabbed my laptop, came back into bed.
Did you date anyone this past summer?
No, other than you know who. (By you know who I mean no one).
Who was the last friend in your house?
Father Christmas
Is there someone you want to fight?
There's only one way to find out... FIGHT.
What are you thinking about right now?
I should shower.
What were you doing an hour ago?
Lying in bed.
Where were you friday night?
Home
Do you wear the seatbelt in the car?
Yes, when I haven't got a socially awkward reason not to.
Has anyone ever mistaken you for someone else?
Father Christmas
Next vacation you are going on?
Reading.
Do you like to text or call more?
Neither. It's rude to bother people ;)
Whats the closest blue object to you?
My quilt!
Is there anyone you hate?
You, nothing personal, you've just got one of those faces.
Do you like the color orange?
It's amazing.
Where was your last long road trip to?
Father Christmas
Sometimes, do you wish you were someone else?
Oh yes. Like Father Christmas.
Who did you last talk to on the phone to?
My mum, she was in Malta, an international call, how exciting!
Where will you be in an hour?
In the shower? It'll take me about an hour to get out of bed.
I haven't bothered to write an introductory paragraph to this, sorry.
Seeing as everyone enjoyed the photos of me in my last blog, here's another one.
Hello friends, how goes it with you? This is me, the ginger bastard reporting in on his much neglected blog. Well let's see what's in the news... I see a song about Ribean is currently number one in the charts, good on Kanye for rapping about that marvelous drink, think I might pop down the shops and buy myself some.
I handed in my dissertation today, guess that means my uni life is nearly over! Oh shit. Guess I'm gonna have to be a responsible adult soon. That means I can't get away with five days without shaving, which I deemed as being a waste of time the last five days what with having a dissertation to finish.
I'm out of material, I'll end with a quote;
'Ribena, I know what you're drinking' Kanye West.
I meant to cram in more jokes into this, but sadly this twaddle I've produced is just 'bare jokes' instead. That's slang for sumamt.
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Now playing: Estelle - American Boy (Radio Edit w/ Kanye)
via FoxyTunes
Or at the very least, some hat modeling work. 1 Silly hat, 3 different facial expressions.
Silly hat! Isn't it fun, doesn't it look fun! FUN! Wacky! FUN!
One silly hat, or is that one sexy hat? You judge for yourself. Phwaoarrrr. Hat.
1 silly hat, or is that 1 very upsetting deeply depressing hat? Waaaa!
Contact me for all your hat wearing needs, I don't have an agent, so there'll be no negotiation of wage, I'll take what ever money you force into my hand! You could even pay me in skittles.
You know what, I've never really understood under what situations one uses the word mate? I thought I understood, but I'm not so sure I do.
At school people would say 'Alright mate', well okay when they'd say alright, it was more of a bear grown; 'Allllroight'. And for years I'd say something along the lines of 'Yes thanks, how are you', but then it dawned on me, maybe the man doesn't respond in this manner, and some how I twigged that maybe I was supposed to say 'Allllroight' in return, so I'd do that instead. But now I'm now not so sure that is correct format and now I just say 'Hey'. When a man says 'Allllroight' is he asking how I am? or is he just saying 'Hello there casual acquittance, I like you, even if I don't really know you that well, but as a casual acquittance, you're alright you are'. I'm not so sure about the latter as I'm sure cunts that didn't like me would be asking as to my well being. It's a mind field, and if anyone out there has cracked the Allllroight code, please help me, please!
As for the word Mate, I've never understood how one uses this word? Is everyone a mate? Since coming to university, I act far more common then I probably really am, but in due consideration of some of the middle class people I've met since being at university, I'm not really that middle class, and probably am a little bit common, I in some situations, call strangers mate. Thank you for the bus ride, 'Cheers mate'. Casual Acquaintances? Mate! Friends? Mate. But should I not be calling them by their name instead? Am I under some delusional belief that I want to fit in with people who read the sun, because the last time I read the sun I couldn't contain my giggles after reading that Robbie Williams had seen 3 UFOs and believed in aliens. Who even writes articles like this? Morons or Mormons?
So gentle readers if you can help me in my 'Allllroight Mate' and 'Mate' debacles, yor assistance would be greatly received with thanks.
I got a man cut today.
Just thought you might like to know.
No, I'm not writing the dissertation with the ever looming deadline.
Yes, this is a pointless blog post.
And yes, I do love you.
How are you today?
I've had it, with the motherfucking length of my hair on my motherfucking head.
As I mentioned a few blog down, this week I'd be revealing my world famous fortune teller gag! Well here goes.
Step 1: Get a blank sheet of paper and make a fortune teller, the paper must be blank, this cannot be stressed enough. If you don't know how to make a fortune teller, ask leading internet search engine Google, if you don't know what a fortune teller is, you're an idiot.
Step 2: Ask the recipient of the fortune teller to pick a number, now quite clearly there are no numbers are drawn, but convince them there is, the number 0 (a.ka. nothing) is there, ask them to pick that.
Step3: Now open the fortune teller 0 times (so just open it) and ask them to pick a number again, of course they'll know the drill and say 0.
Step 4: Now open the fortune teller, any panel will do, and of course is blank, so quite clearly there future reads as 'nothing will happen'.
Try it for yourself and become the toast of dinner parties all round. Or a reject.
Tabloid journalism at its worse today folks, from the sun
'KATE MOSS appears to have stopped off on the forest moon of Endor for her latest fashion accessory.
She stepped out in Manhattan on Tuesday with what looked like a dead Ewok from Star Wars over her shoulder.
It’s a dead ringer for Luke Skywalker’s furry friend Wicket, right – but surely Ewoks are an endangered species?'
Luke Skywalker's friend? do your fucking research the sun, quite clearly anyone who has watched Return of the Jedi will point out that Luke and Wicket never even hang out in the film, I'm not saying that Leia doesn't introduce Luke to Leia at some point (although I think she'd be more concerned that Luke, the guy she has kissed two times, is infact her brother rather than ensuring that Wicket and Luke have a meaningful enough of a friendship to become facebook friends). Princess Leia's friend would be more correct, or even Han Solo, who can forget Wicket and and Han's splendidly awkward dance? And besides who's to say ewoks are endangered? From Return of the Jedi, quite clearly there are babies, those ewoks are humping away reporducing. Admittedly at the battle of endor some ewoks did die, and boy did we cry, but endangered? Just another example of tabloid journalism adding to the already unnecessary level of fear in this country! The Sun is no better than Joseph Goebbels. Besides quite clearly the fur that Kate Moss is carrying looks more like Logray and not Wicket.
See, quite clearly the fur resembles the head shaman for the Ewok tribe who lived in Bright Tree Village, Logray! Retards!
And don't even get me started on that substitute for must with the word moss! What is wrong with the world!
It's times like this when I'm writing away my star wars woes that I'm reminded of a quote from Knowing Me, Knowing You, With Alan Partridge (Episode 5, 25:34) 'Get yourself a girlfriend'.
I have no ruddy idea what I quite mean with the title to this blog, but I is nicking the MeMe thingy that the Dan did of the the blog fame in order to trade of his cool and for me to do something that will result in the most pleasurable sound know to man (the sound of a man thrashing it out on a keyboard, by trashing I mean typing, yeah that).
The house I grew up in...
had two television aerials, one side of the house we'd have Meridian, the other we'd have London television. Another excitement was my thunderbirds wallpaper, I was only allowed thunderbirds border, in case I out grew thunderbirds, which I eventually did. (Although it still has a kick ass theme, and if I was talented and driven enough I'd make my own proper thunderbirds film, done properly and not that horse shit of the recent film).
When I was a child I wanted to be...
a thunderbird? a cartoonist? a postman? a man who did silly voices?
Actually I don't think I ever wanted to be a thunderbird, to brave for me.
The moment that changed me for ever...
was year 10 at school when we changed sites for school and I just became woefully awkward and lacked confidence. Crazy days (look I'm using humour because I'm being depressing!)
My greatest inspiration...
is you, you reading this inspires me to type out this clap trap sometime a few times a month.
My real-life villain...
Oh I don't hate anyone enough to have a villan, other than cunts at school, but that's behind me.
If I could change one thing about myself...
to be less awkward?
At night I dream of...
a wide variety of wank (wanks in dreams are called wet dreams), the other day I dreamed up my own super hero story, I can't remember any sadly, but I'm sure it would be a kick ass film and a superb graphic novel.
What I see when I look in the mirror...
is myself, I usually get bored of my own reflection so pull a stupid face.
My style icon...
whaaaaaaaaa? Style? I just buy some cheap shit from Primark that I feel comfortable enough in.
My favourite item of clothing...
is my pants, because I can't do comando, I like the cupping around the bollocks too much.
I wish I'd never worn...
tracksuit bottoms!
It's not fashionable but I like...
Hear'say, shit they've just come onto my itunes shuffle. I am fashionable.
You wouldn't know it but I'm very good at...
Hear'Say trivia. Did you know Mylene Klass went on that I'm a celebrity show. FACT!
You may not know it but I'm no good at...
Liberty X trivia, did not care for them. They insist upon themselves.
All my money goes on...
DVDs, Drinking, buying packed sandwiches everyday even though it would be cheaper to make my own, food, drink (of non alcholic varieties), tat, tits.
If I have time to myself...
I PROCRASTINATE my prostate off.
I drive/ride...
when I scrounge lifts, but I don't mind the walk.
My house/flat is...
Oh I tidied my room today, it took 3 hours, but I did it, would you like to see photos, its so great, you can see the carpet and everything. Oh yesh.
Well it was either tidy me room or do my dissertation, as you can see I made the right decision.
My most valuable possession is...
my willy, it permits me to expel urine, which is waste product.
My favourite building...
is the sexy new carrington building on campus, it defines sex for all to enjoy. Sadly I can't find any photos for you to enjoy on google, but I got a nice image of the B&Q logo, so imagine that here, and feel aroused.
Movie heaven...
is watching a star wars film.
A book that changed me...
is Star Wars the book of the film, its like what I watched in the cinema, but printed in text for me imagine myself. Except red leader was blue leader in the book!
My favourite work of art...
is some of my procrastination art which you can find somewhere on this blog.
The last album I bought/downloaded...
The Go Team!
The person who really makes me laugh...
are professional comedians that are paid to do that kind of stuff.
After watching the empire awards last night, Rob Brydon doing stand up or presenting doesn't make me laugh, just makes me cringe, he's a great comedy actor, not a comedian, stick to what you're good at Rob, please!
The shop I can't walk past...
is Tk Haxxzor without wanting to vomit.
The best invention ever...
is the internets I like the internets.
In ten years time, I hope to be...
a sex offender/ a murderer/ a rapist/ a therapist.
Oh I mis-read the question and thought it said 'hoped not be'
My greatest regret...
is not worth me thinking about because then I'll think 'I regret that'
My life in seven words...
Procastinating.
Typography.
Sleeping.
Makingatitofmyself.
Laughingatthecomedy.
Drinking.
Brushing.
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Now playing: Hear'say - Pure and Simple
via FoxyTunes
Rawk on!
It's calling you a tart!
Oh noes, it's got your name wrong and called you Tom!
Just some of the wonderful gags you can have with condiments when you're next eating out with friends, try it for yourself, and see how quickly your friends disown you, because you're making them laugh so hard they forget to laugh.
Next week I'll give you my world famous fortune teller gag, for when you're eating out with friends, get the bill and make a fortune teller from the receipt.
