Do your research the sun!

Tabloid journalism at its worse today folks, from the sun
'KATE MOSS appears to have stopped off on the forest moon of Endor for her latest fashion accessory.

She stepped out in Manhattan on Tuesday with what looked like a dead Ewok from Star Wars over her shoulder.

It’s a dead ringer for Luke Skywalker’s furry friend Wicket, right – but surely Ewoks are an endangered species?'

Luke Skywalker's friend? do your fucking research the sun, quite clearly anyone who has watched Return of the Jedi will point out that Luke and Wicket never even hang out in the film, I'm not saying that Leia doesn't introduce Luke to Leia at some point (although I think she'd be more concerned that Luke, the guy she has kissed two times, is infact her brother rather than ensuring that Wicket and Luke have a meaningful enough of a friendship to become facebook friends). Princess Leia's friend would be more correct, or even Han Solo, who can forget Wicket and and Han's splendidly awkward dance? And besides who's to say ewoks are endangered? From Return of the Jedi, quite clearly there are babies, those ewoks are humping away reporducing. Admittedly at the battle of endor some ewoks did die, and boy did we cry, but endangered? Just another example of tabloid journalism adding to the already unnecessary level of fear in this country! The Sun is no better than Joseph Goebbels. Besides quite clearly the fur that Kate Moss is carrying looks more like Logray and not Wicket.



See, quite clearly the fur resembles the head shaman for the Ewok tribe who lived in Bright Tree Village, Logray! Retards!

And don't even get me started on that substitute for must with the word moss! What is wrong with the world!

It's times like this when I'm writing away my star wars woes that I'm reminded of a quote from Knowing Me, Knowing You, With Alan Partridge (Episode 5, 25:34) 'Get yourself a girlfriend'.